There are people who have a very clear vision of what they want in their life, and who take the necessary steps to create it, while for others it can take years and even decades until they finally realize what it is they want. In order to take charge of your life, you need to get clear about what is important to you, what areas of life are your priority (e.g. career, romantic relationship, family, friends, health, finances...), what values are important for you in your relationships, what values are important at your work place, etc.

For example, if someone likes creativity, and is stuck in a boring, repetitive job, they will feel frustrated and depressed. Or if a woman would like to advance in her career, but is feeling pressure from her environment to have children – while she herself isn't so thrilled about it – she might feel guilty and conflicted about it. To me e.g. it's important to do what I love and believe in. This is a value that guides me in choosing my career.

Knowing our values helps us in dilemmas, e.g. if we should stay at our current job or quit, or whether we should start our own business or not. When we have our values sorted out, we can live a more fulfilled life – one that reflects our true priorities. It gives us more self-confidence and determination to go after what we truly want. Also, we feel more at peace with ourselves, free from inner conflict and division. This makes us authentic – we can be who we are, without guilt and the pressure to please others.